| 8AM | Wake up and make out with hot young wife |
| 9AM | Eat |
| 10AM | Go to studio to work on “Rays” album |
| 10:05AM | Quit working on “Rays” album |
| 11AM | Go to an office supply store to buy some white out and boast to the cashier that "My mom invented this" |
| 12PM | Eat |
| 1PM | Work on “Fried Pies” book |
| 1:05PM | Quit working on “Fried Pies” book |
| 2PM | Eat |
| 2:30PM | Work on “American Gene” book |
| 2:35PM | Quit working on “American Gene” book |
| 4PM | Nap |
| 5PM | Go to local mall to brag to the teenagers who are hanging around that he invented MTV |
| 5:06PM | Leave the mall after a crowd of teenagers doesn't believe that the "fat man with a Texas accent” invented MTV (or that he even knows what it is) |
| 6PM | Eat |
| 7PM | Auction off wool hat on E-Bay |
| 7:05PM | Withdraws wool hat from auction on E-Bay due to lack of interest |
| 8PM | Attends an AFI function and asked by a reporter “Who are you?” |
| 9PM | Eat |
| 11PM | He and the Gihon Foundation Board have the answer to the World's biggest problem: paper or plastic |
| 9AM | Early morning swim wearing too tight bikini swimsuit |
| 10AM | Daily call to the Beavertown city hall to convince them that a Monkees Museum could become a popular attraction |
| 10:15AM | Daily prank call to Ed Begley, Jr. (May I speak to first name "Yourl" last name "Oser") |
| 10:30AM | Daily facial, massage and teeth whitening |
| 10:45AM | Opens up his refrigerator and upon seeing the bright single light bulb did a 15 minute concert |
| 11AM | Go to local country club to play a round of golf |
| 11:10AM | Shows everybody within sight endless pictures of his grandson |
| 12:30PM | Realizes after he hits his 6th ball into a sand trap that he can't play golf |
| 1:15PM | Begins to write a self-help book but realizes he is perfect and doesn't need help |
| 1:35PM | Shows everybody within sight endless pictures of his grandson |
| 2PM | Discussion on his love of horses leads to 3 hour lecture |
| 2:15PM | Shows everybody within sight endless pictures of his grandson |
| 6PM | A bookstore signing takes strange turn when the store realizes that they don't sell “Daydream Believin' " |
| 7PM | Shows everybody within sight endless pictures of his grandson |
| 7:30PM | Puts on the striped jacket he wore on his appearance for a “The Brady Bunch” episode 30 years ago just to see if it still fits |
| 7:45PM | Forgets the words to the songs in his “Oliver!” medley |
| 8:15PM | Shows his man boobs during concert |
| 10:40PM | After concert mob in the meet and greet room turns out to be the extended Jones family |
| 11PM | During an interview when asked who is his favorite TV personality he replies: “Me...if I'm in the news” |
| 11:10AM | During an interview, he tries to take credit for the entire Monkees phenomenon and insists Mike was never a band member just “special guest” on the TV series |
| 10AM | Wake up and make out with hot young wife |
| 11AM | Calls Hair Club For Men |
| 1PM | Calls Stetson for a new cowboy hat |
| 2PM | While working on his latest geometric shaped painting, he realizes that all of his paintings have a sexual metaphor to them |
| 3PM | At a session with clairvoyant John Edwards, Edwards can only make contact with the Ghost Of Christmas Past's answering service |
| 3:02PM | John Edwards senses the spirit of “crazy dead” Elmer but is unable to figure out how Micky can play the trumpet |
| 3:05PM | Leaves the session with John Edwards to see “The Great Oraculo: The World's Leading Mentalist” for his assistance with finding the person who told him to see clairvoyant John Edwards |
| 5PM | Brings sister Coco on tour due to lack of band members |
| 7PM | Due to lack of interest at his cruise ship appearances, he makes his own introduction |
| 7:25PM | Joke about the Monkees experience being like Leonard Nimoy really becoming a Vulcan takes ugly turn when Leonard Nimoy issues a cease and desist order |
| 8PM | When singing the “Monkee's Theme” in different languages someone in the audience requested it in Zulu to which he replied: “Zulu? No I usually won” |
| 11PM | Auction off concert sweat towel on E-Bay |
| 11:05PM | Withdraws concert sweat towel when the highest bid on E-Bay was one dollar |
| 10AM | Wake up |
| 10:15AM | Daily call to an employment agency to inquire about openings for any "Pete digger" jobs |
| 10:30AM | Just for fun, he decides to act like the Peter Tork dumb persona character from the TV series |
| 11AM | An interview question on his opinion of today’s artists leads to 3 hour discussion |
| 2PM | Decides to hire a look alike to answer these interview questions: “What happened to the guy with the wool hat? and Do you ever get tired of Monkeeing around?” |
| 3PM | An interview question on his opinion on what is good blues and jazz leads to 1 hour discussion |
| 5PM | At a Peter Tork/ James Lee Stanley Two Man Band concert, someone asks James: “Which Monkee were you?” |
| 8PM | During Shoe Suede Blues concert he refuses to perform any Mike Nesmith written songs because of the large royalty fee to perform them in public |
| 10:30PM | Attempts to pick up a woman with line: “If you got the time, I've got the Viagra” |
| 10:40PM | Realizes his second pick up line (“I was a Monkee, you know”) does not work after she laughs in his face |
| 11:30PM | Goes to the Village to burn it |
